I can't believe it's been since November 17 since I've blogged! I've been busy celebrating Thanksgiving and counting my blessings--and eating, of course.
I'm not sure if I can even remember all that's happened since the 17th, but I'll try to hit the biggies.
I guess my biggest new thing is radiation. I started on Monday, and so far have lived through 3 treatments. Talking with my doctor and taking the preparatory education class didn't prepare me for the harsh realities of radiation treatments. I guess I must be different from a lot of people, because I've been told over and over that radiation is no big deal, lots better than chemo, etc., but I hate it. Nothing is more isolating and dehumanizing than being laid on a slab of metal, told to lay there like a dead person while two technicians pull you with a sheet until your body is perfectly aligned under a lazer beam, and then left by yourself while the technicians retreat behind a 24-inch-thick door that protects them from the treatment they're giving you. That and the big warning sign in caps that reads, "Danger! High radiation area" have me not loving my new cancer erradicating phase. The good news--I get Christmas and New Year's Days off! Greg says I'm crazy, but give me 6 weeks more chemo any day!
While I'm fighting cancer, family life inevitably goes on. All of us spent a quick but lovely couple of days up in Donnelly with Greg's mom and her husband, Ron, for Thanksgiving. We had great food, a comfortable warm cabin to sleep in, ATV riding, satellite TV for football games, and even a little snow, but not so much that we couldn't drive home. Thanksgiving evening we had a chance to say what we were thankful for, and I mentioned the good health of my kids and husband. What a great blessing that is! Our home teacher, Jesse McOmber, challenged us to write down 100 things we were thankful for, and also pray for ten minutes straight just about our blessings. Cute little Kate came up with 50 things she was grateful for before the rest of us even got a chance. Rachel wrote that she was thankful for the abacus, and other such witticisms, and it ended up that we needed more room. The praying thing wasn't hard for me either. It's easy to fill up 10 minutes with thankyous to Heavenly Father. I appreciate Jesse for giving us the opportunity to recognize all we have!
Our Thanksgiving dinner was flanked by two spaghetti dinners at Centennial. Right before the holiday Rachel's orchestra had a fundraising dinner, and this week Hunter's wrestling team did the same. Greg has had his fill of fundraising opportunities at Centennial. With football, orchestra, and wrestling all raising funds, we'd be money ahead if we just paid outright for the trips and camps we're helping our kids raise money for. Funny how that works, isn't it. The people with the kids in the activities who are already shelling out the cash are also the fundraising pool. Here's another great opportunity to be thankful. Greg still has a job so our kids are still able to hit us up for fundraisers!
Can I just say that even with all my blessings acknowledged and appreciated, life is proving to be a little stressful for me. Christmas season, which I somehow manage to love in spite of rampant commercialism, is a very busy time for me under the best of circumstances. This year I have 27 more radiation treatments thrown into the mix. I hope I can provide a meaningful and happy season for my kids in the midst of it all. My friends are trying to help by coming to decorate my house with me this Friday. I am VERY thankful for friends!
I'm lovin' water aerobics, books, college football, the new basketball season, sweet and fleeting moments with Tadman as I hand him off to grandmas, and prayer right now. Those warm things keep me going back to that cold metal slab. Thanks to my mom for helping get Taddy ready for the YMCA in the mornings and helping me make beds and fold clothes. I'm incredibly far behind. Congratulations to my sister Heather and her daughter Brennan. My sister just became a grandmother for the first time!
Continue to pray for me. Pray that this scary radiation won't fry areas of my body that I'm going to need later. Pray that I'll somehow be able to be the mom my kids need through it all. Pray that my husband won't give up before this trial is over, and pray that after my last treatment is over,my family will get a little reprieve from the growth opportunities available only through trials. Thanks for reading, and enjoy this all too brief Christmas season!
I'm sorry radiation isn't more appealing. Does it make you feel sick after or anything?
ReplyDeleteWell, I'm excited to come tomorrow. It will be a great Dec kickoff for the Christmas season.
MElinda
Margi, I have been wondering how radiation was going--I'm sorry I didn't call sooner and check in. Hang in there. I know its easy for me to say that, with both breasts, hair, and no appointments to be nuked! But we want you around for many years to come, and if that means frying the cancer, we want to help you through it.
ReplyDeleteWe look forward to seeing you on Saturday! The last few games I've watched your section and wondered if you were warm enough, and worrying about you!
Love you!
So good to have an update. Thanks! I wish radiation was the piece of cake others said it would be. Sorry about that! There's a poem that I've sort of adopted as my personal motto that starts out like, "Keep a prayer on your lips, a song in your heart, and a reverence for life in your soul..." When I read your musings I feel that reverence for life. And not in any morbid way, but in the way of recognizing that each breath we take is like drawing upon sacred funds. Does that make sense? You are as permanant in our prayers as... as... well, as a permanant! (Ok, how's that for being cheesey and retro at the same time?!) Love you!
ReplyDeleteHi Margi,
ReplyDeleteThanks for the update. Sorry the radiation isn't pleasant . . . ok, I guess none of us really expected it would be . . . I mean, with a name like radiation . . . it would be very hard for me to fit a trip to the doctor into every day's schedule. That alone is a big challenge. This too shall pass . . . much more quickly than the chemo. We still pray for you every day! So glad I know that prayers are answered!
Love you.
Heidi
Margi,
ReplyDeleteHow did I not know what you have been going through. That makes me probably the worst friend in the history of friendships.
I have just read about your ordeal on this blog and I'm so proud of you and thankful that things are going as well as they are. If I find out who gave you cancer they are really in trouble.
What great friends and family you have. If I ever got that sick I can't think of anyone I'd rather have there for me than your sisters and your mom. All the times in your life you were so helpful to others has finally come full circle and you can be on the receiving end of some well earned help and pampering. I feel like a total slug for not being around for you. I see or hear little things all the time that remind me of you and what a character you are.
Hang in there Margi. It sounds like you are headed to the goal line with no blockers in sight. (That's about all the football I know.)
You are in my prayers and I plan to see you soon so don't be shocked if I appear at your door one day.
love
joan rands