Merry Christmas To Our Families and Friends. We Couldn't Have Made it Through 2009 Without YOU!

I made it! I somehow managed to do the shopping, the trimming, the concerts, the recitals, the wrestling meets, AND the radiation. I am now through with 19 of 30 treatments, all my physical therapy appointments, and all but a few final doctors appointments. It's almost time to face life after cancer without all the extra help and support and without the excuses. I'm not sure what that life's going to be like yet, but I won't worry about that now. January is for looking ahead--December is for reflection upon the year past.
In our family, 2009 will forever be remembered as the year Margi was diagnosed with breast cancer, or more officially, moderately differentiated ductal carcinoma, grade 2-3, estrogen positive, her 2 negative. The diagnosis came on March 3, just days after Hunter celebrated his 15th birthday with friends at Chuck E. Cheese's (Yup, that's right, 15th, Chuck E. Cheese's). The very next day I met with a surgeon and an oncologist, and on March 13 prepared for a long and grueling cancer treatment regimen by having my gall bladder removed and a port placed (the port makes chemotherapy more convenient because it can be accessed easily without having to access a vein for injections and blood draws). Surgery was followed by six months of chemotherapy, a mastectomy of the left breast, and radiation. So except for January and February, my family and I have been doing this all year. Amazingly enough, with the exception of a few awful weeks in early summer when I suffered through pneumonia, life for the Nettles has been pretty much business as usual.
Greg somehow managed to hang on to The Stereo Shoppe in spite of the horrible economic conditions, but he had to do it with fewer employees and six day work weeks. Early in the year he was balancing family, work, my doctor's appointments, and coaching Hunter's AAU basketball team. Looking back on it I'm not sure how he did it, but it was worth it, because he really enjoys coaching. Like lots of other men in their mid 40's, Greg was hoping to be working less at this point in his life, but I know he's very grateful he's still able to support the family, and of course, the medical insurance was invaluable this year!
Perhaps the only family member busier than Greg is Rachel. She added a boyfriend, speech and debate, and jazz band to an already very full plate. Perhaps my diagnosis has been more of a burden to her than to the other kids. She's done more worrying and more babysitting this year than last. She's still playing cello, still an excellent student, and she's in the process of choosing a college for next year. She's been accepted to Willamette and College of Idaho, waiting to hear from University of Puget Sound and Whitworth, and still planning on applying to University of Utah.
Hunter's year started with basketball, moved to spring football, then on to summer football, followed by the actual football season (he played for both JV and varsity teams), and now he's moved on to WRESTLING! We're all getting used to a culture we've never been exposed to before--the world of sweaty singlets, ringworm infested mats, and stat girls. Oh how I miss basketball! But Hunter is learning quickly, getting super fit, and has already won a tournament, so I guess it's worth it. He's a half a merit badge and an Eagle project away from being an Eagle Scout, and when he gets that taken care of he's looking forward to taking driver's training. He remains a delightful kid to spend time with.
As Rachel and Hunter pursue music and athletics, Parker draws, and makes movies, and listens to music and reworks his wardrobe. He's an incredibly creative kid. This year he's attending an alternative middle school, Pathways. It emphasises smaller class sizes and a no failure policy. There are no zeros given, and the teachers expect the students to finish all work, no matter how long it takes. He loved it at first, and is not quite so sure now, but he's plugging away and trying hard to be a good student. He's also taking care of several family pets, including our bunny, Oreo, and our cat, Lucky. We're all mourning the passing of our beloved gecko, a pet Parker'd taken care of for several years.
Like a lot of younger kids in a family, Kate seems to want to try everything. She's taking piano lessons, dancing, and going to achievement days for church every other week. During the past year she's done cheerleading, gymnastics, basketball, and soccer as well. She loves going to Rachel's concerts, Hunter's games, and Parker's doctor's appointments. She's a great big sister to Tadman and plays with him delightfully. She loves friends, school, church, and pretty much everything. My favorite thing about Kate is her enthusiastic anticipation of upcoming events. I get excited right along with her. She's really looking forward to starting violin lessons next year, and playing in the Joplin orchestra.
And we all adore Tadman, who will be turning three January 26th. Tadman loves trucks, cars, diggers, trailers, RVs, ATVs, and everything with wheels. He can be sweet and cuddly (most of the time) or occasionally loud and bossy. We're not sure which of us he is emulating. He brings happiness and joy to everyone in the family. We all delight in the cute things he says, the way he looks, and everything he does. It's been a trying year for little Taddy. He's gone from nursing and being tended by his mom all the time, to being unexpectedly and abruptly weened and spending lots of time with aunts, grandmas, and friends. It's been hard on him, and harder on me! The best thing about being done with treatment will be reestablishing a routine for Tadman.
2009 will not easily be forgotten. We've learned to accept our limitations and with those limitations, lots of help from others. I've learned that much of my life was extracurricular, and I've been able to eliminate a few things. When you're forced to examine your life and what's of the greatest importance, very few things make the cut. Faith, family, love, service are about it.
We couldn't have made it through the year without the prayers and support of our family and friends. Hot meals came for months. My sisters and sisters-in-law, nieces, mom, and mother-in-law did so much to help, including laundry, cleaning, mending, babysitting, shopping, decorating, listening, visiting, checking on kids, and many other acts of service. Cards and notes and phone calls helped. Talking to friends who'd recently undergone cancer treatment was invaluable. And somehow by going through this experience I feel more blessed and fortunate than ever before. How happy I am to be alive, to feel good, to snuggle with my Taddy, or go to dinner and a movie with Rachel, to dance with Kate, watch Hunter make a monster block, or see one of Parker's amazing drawings.
How we appreciate having you as friends and family! If we haven't kept in touch, know it's not because we don't care. We think of you often and send best wishes to you all. Thank you for being a part of our lives and enriching our experience.

There's Much to Be Thankful For!

I can't believe it's been since November 17 since I've blogged! I've been busy celebrating Thanksgiving and counting my blessings--and eating, of course.
I'm not sure if I can even remember all that's happened since the 17th, but I'll try to hit the biggies.
I guess my biggest new thing is radiation. I started on Monday, and so far have lived through 3 treatments. Talking with my doctor and taking the preparatory education class didn't prepare me for the harsh realities of radiation treatments. I guess I must be different from a lot of people, because I've been told over and over that radiation is no big deal, lots better than chemo, etc., but I hate it. Nothing is more isolating and dehumanizing than being laid on a slab of metal, told to lay there like a dead person while two technicians pull you with a sheet until your body is perfectly aligned under a lazer beam, and then left by yourself while the technicians retreat behind a 24-inch-thick door that protects them from the treatment they're giving you. That and the big warning sign in caps that reads, "Danger! High radiation area" have me not loving my new cancer erradicating phase. The good news--I get Christmas and New Year's Days off! Greg says I'm crazy, but give me 6 weeks more chemo any day!
While I'm fighting cancer, family life inevitably goes on. All of us spent a quick but lovely couple of days up in Donnelly with Greg's mom and her husband, Ron, for Thanksgiving. We had great food, a comfortable warm cabin to sleep in, ATV riding, satellite TV for football games, and even a little snow, but not so much that we couldn't drive home. Thanksgiving evening we had a chance to say what we were thankful for, and I mentioned the good health of my kids and husband. What a great blessing that is! Our home teacher, Jesse McOmber, challenged us to write down 100 things we were thankful for, and also pray for ten minutes straight just about our blessings. Cute little Kate came up with 50 things she was grateful for before the rest of us even got a chance. Rachel wrote that she was thankful for the abacus, and other such witticisms, and it ended up that we needed more room. The praying thing wasn't hard for me either. It's easy to fill up 10 minutes with thankyous to Heavenly Father. I appreciate Jesse for giving us the opportunity to recognize all we have!
Our Thanksgiving dinner was flanked by two spaghetti dinners at Centennial. Right before the holiday Rachel's orchestra had a fundraising dinner, and this week Hunter's wrestling team did the same. Greg has had his fill of fundraising opportunities at Centennial. With football, orchestra, and wrestling all raising funds, we'd be money ahead if we just paid outright for the trips and camps we're helping our kids raise money for. Funny how that works, isn't it. The people with the kids in the activities who are already shelling out the cash are also the fundraising pool. Here's another great opportunity to be thankful. Greg still has a job so our kids are still able to hit us up for fundraisers!
Can I just say that even with all my blessings acknowledged and appreciated, life is proving to be a little stressful for me. Christmas season, which I somehow manage to love in spite of rampant commercialism, is a very busy time for me under the best of circumstances. This year I have 27 more radiation treatments thrown into the mix. I hope I can provide a meaningful and happy season for my kids in the midst of it all. My friends are trying to help by coming to decorate my house with me this Friday. I am VERY thankful for friends!
I'm lovin' water aerobics, books, college football, the new basketball season, sweet and fleeting moments with Tadman as I hand him off to grandmas, and prayer right now. Those warm things keep me going back to that cold metal slab. Thanks to my mom for helping get Taddy ready for the YMCA in the mornings and helping me make beds and fold clothes. I'm incredibly far behind. Congratulations to my sister Heather and her daughter Brennan. My sister just became a grandmother for the first time!
Continue to pray for me. Pray that this scary radiation won't fry areas of my body that I'm going to need later. Pray that I'll somehow be able to be the mom my kids need through it all. Pray that my husband won't give up before this trial is over, and pray that after my last treatment is over,my family will get a little reprieve from the growth opportunities available only through trials. Thanks for reading, and enjoy this all too brief Christmas season!